Choosing Happiness

Source: Quotablecards

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have been bullied my entire life. From as young as I can remember, I've had my hair pulled, clothes spit on, names called out to me in some variation or another having to do with whales, pigs or cows. I've been told I was ugly, unloveable, unmarryable and for a few years in my teens I was often compared to my best friend and reminded that I wasn't as pretty or smart as she.

On the flip-side, there have been a few people in my life that have done more than their fair share of anti-bullying for me. These are the people that have provided unconditional love to me no matter how low I was feeling about myself or what others were saying. These people are the very select few that get to know the rawest version of me. This group is very small and I can count all of its members on one hand. I'm eternally grateful for this small network of people that have reminded me I'm not worthless, pathetic or ugly. I owe them so much gratitude I can't even explain it.

With some of the bullyish behavior I've been experiencing lately, I've tried to get myself on a happiness kick. My depression-medicated mind knows that in order for my resilient tendencies to kick in, I need to focus on the good and not the bad. If I focused on the bad my entire life, I'd be in an urn somewhere on my parents' mantle. 

I watched a documentary recently about Finding Happiness (PBS' This Emotional Life: Happiness). In all of the stories and scientific evidence, it was noted that all of the people selected had chosen happiness. It was like they were at the Emotion Store and decided to wander down the Happiness aisle. There were stories of POWs and several sick or incapacitated people who could have been hateful, angry or mean but instead focused on being happy as a means to surviving.

I like to think I'm choosing happiness as my means to surviving. I've not had an easy childhood. I don't have the most ideal marital living situation and I wasn't given a working set of reproductive organs to have my own children. I could choose to be angry about all of this. I'd have good reason to be, but instead, I'm content. I appreciate what lessons these difficulties have given me.

Whenever I hear a stepparent agonize over the difficulties in their life I want to let them know I can appreciate it on some level. We all have difficulties. The trick is how you overcome the difficulties. Do you choose to be angry? Do you blame others in your family? Do you stop, look inward, and see if there is anything you can adapt about yourself? What would happen if you chose happiness?

What is it that you choose that gets you through the day?